The Halfie Complex by Hana Abdulla

I will never forget the day my dad told me I couldn’t play soccer with him anymore. I was getting older and there were no other girls on the field. As an 8-year old, I didn’t understand why my brothers … Continue reading

I’m Trying to Figure Out How To Save The World

I’m trying to figure out how to save the world
Men reshaped and molded it, using one element and then the next
Ignorant to the state of their neighbors
Most people on the world are slaves to the limits of their resources
We are not equals
But now we must put aside our differences
Forget what one has done to the Other
To save this earth, stripped and shaved
This earth that is not my body, to be claimed, capitalized on and discarded
As if there will be no lasting effect
As if I don’t remember the night I realized I could die
The night I thought I would leave
But didn’t
This earth cannot be me
Silent, waiting
Hoping things will get better
Hoping if we understand the man he will stop
Thinking time will heal it, him
The earth, this society, is singing its death song
And most of us haven’t even found our voice yet

I do not know how to act
My stereotype threat prepares me for every important encounter
Speaking on a subject I am impassioned about, but poorly educated on
When will there be enough information to convince you I am not a woman?
Someone they assume knows nothing
Holding a lowly position
Any position
I am afraid of

It’s easy to forget my agency
To feel like it was taken, used too quickly by those with power
Who never asked
I never asked

Now, equality cannot be the issue
We must save this body
This body they have used
To what end
Another man in charge
Following what another man tells me is a good idea
I do not want his agenda to be my agenda
I want us, the silent us
To be what saves the earth

I cannot sit by
Not knowing what action looks like
Not holding the optimism necessary to embark on this endeavor
I have other things to do
Work on this belly roll
File my taxes
Order more contacts
Drink more water
Make art
Couldn’t someone else do it?

The State of Women Of Color in the US

The State of Women Of Color in the US

I like to have stats like this in my back pocket when people try to argue with me that “racism/sexism doesn’t really exist anymore. Is there any research to prove that?”

And then:
“What are the sources for this?”

What is this, a PhD panel? Whenever you’re having a casual conversation about racism/sexism with a white man/woman (not all of them obviously, but rarely have I encountered this while talking to another woman of color) suddenly they need to have accredited academic sources for everything you’re saying. I never ask for sources to back up THEIR DAY TO DAY EXPERIENCE.